this past week i've been super busy with midterms and procrastination. staying up until 6 to study is definitely not good practice for a healthy body, but then again staying up 'til 5 for no particular purpose isn't all that great either. the library has been a comfy second home, and the silence in there has served wonders. cramming for exams has not been fun, but i'm happy to say i did pretty dang well. even so, i need to change my poor study habits! so maybe i can pursue med after all? we will see.

is this that cycle again? i hope not.

insomnia has hit me again and i find myself unable to curl in my sheets! maybe a quick recap of my new chapter in life?
i must admit my initial outlook on san diego wasn't all that great. on top of the fact that eleanor roosevelt college cast me away as an "overflow" to the dungeons of revelle, i had an extremely late enrollment date and found myself in combat with wait-listed classes up to 14 people. i then risked expulsion with 0 enrolled credits and waited my time out, and i was thankfully able to snatch some newly opened sections. hallelujah! i started with three classes and one seminar, which was later dropped because i found philosophy to be utterly boring and repetitive. as for the people here, i must say they have their unique quirks. don't get me wrong - i have met some amazing people, and i plan to see them for a long time from now.
with one week in the fresh quarter system, there was only one thing i looked forward to and that was the 220 audition! although my relationship with hip-hop has been fairly new and relatively amateur, i feel i was born to do it. i have never felt happier and more myself hipping and hopping at dance studios and in front of the disc jockeys than jazzercising and jete-ing across the floor. with little room for error, i gave the audition piece my best shot, and to my knowledge rocked it. sadly i was later informed by the team's myspace page that my performance did not sell. i was eager to argue they accidentally misspelled my name as "tina wang," but of course, that argument was farce because tina actually exists. to my dismay, i will not have a dance family this year - for the very first time in a very, very long time. :( my hopes have somewhat dwindled but rejection has never been tough enough to stop me from becoming better! i have taken a couple of classes at culture shock dance center and have been amazed by the choreographers and their routines. unexpectedly, i even took class from a jabbawockee and nearly died attempting breakdancing moves, but nevertheless it was amazing!
as for academics, i greatly despise the quarter system because it leaves absolutely no room for procrastination. and this is supposed to train me to become a better student, right? college is much more different from high school because everything is conducted according to your self-motivation. without that, all else fails. i also learned that studying at a consistent basis is essential for good grades. i want to do good. i want to do good in school. being the indecisive person i am, i remain undeclared in major and in life. i am considering tackling biology and med, but the road seems far and treacherous. we shall see, yes? this thursday i will be another year older and (hopefully) wiser, and my present will consist of two midterms the following day. yay! but i will forgive my professors because i have already received the best of the bestest gift and blessing ever - someone that loves me for me. it almost scares me sometimes how he finds my individuality greatly fascinating because from past treatment and previous experience, i have thought otherwise. i don't want to constantly tell myself to hold back because i don't need to anymore. this is it. love and its never-ending boundaries, and i have never been happier to embrace it. he makes me the happiest girl alive.<3